A Golden Girls, Funniest Moment…

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Cracks me up!…

Rose: “What is taking so long? It’s been hours!”

Sophia: ” Took me 3 1/2 days to have Dorothy. I finally coaxed her out with a pork chop.”

Dorothy: “You know, Ma, you’re really making me feel very bad. You keep telling me how hard it was; and how long it took to have me.”

Sophia: “Did I mention the colic?”

Dorothy: “Ma! You’re hurting my feelings!”

Sophia: “Not as much as you hurt my “oonie”.

Dorothy: “Ma!”

Sophia: “I’ll tell you something, Dorothy: No matter how much pain I went through, and it was a lot, I wouldn’t give up having you for anything in the world.”

Dorothy: “Thanks, Ma.”

Sophia: “And I knew you’d be special!”

Dorothy: “And I didn’t disappoint you?”

Sophia: “A little.”

Dorothy: “Oh, I guess every mother feels as though their children are going to be special when they first see them.”

Rose: “And then we disappoint them by not becoming “Olympic stars”.

Dorothy: “Oh, Rose. Rose, honey, is that why you’re training? for your parents?”

Rose: “They always wanted me to be a champion ice skater. They were so proud watching me practice. I know their dream was for me to win a gold medal. But I HATE ice skating!”

Dorothy: “Rose, listen. You don’t have to do ANYTHING to please your parents.”

Sophia: “She’s right. I’d like to be proud of Dorothy for something. But I’m not gonna kill myself if that day never comes.”

Rose: “But, my parents called me ‘Twinkle Toes.'”

Sophia: “I called Dorothy ‘Bigfoot’. That doesn’t mean she has to make tracks all over the northwest.”

Dorothy: “What Ma is trying to say is that she loves me for what I am.”

Sophia: “That’s right. An over-the-hill school teacher who has to wait for the phone to ring to know if she has to work that day!”

Dorothy: “It doesn’t matter what your parents want, Rose. You’re never going to make them happy. They’re just gonna nag you, and nag you—until you wanna grab them by their throats and CHOKE them! But you DON’T! Because you’re in a HOSPITAL…with RESUSCITATING EQUIPMENT!!!”

Bahahaha! 😀

the firestarter, a Poem by Sanguine Woods

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Dedicated to Curt Jarrell…

the firestarter

deem not tomorrow
sentient or flesh
quick flash
then none
torment not a
somber hope a
promised light
forever burning—
measure fire
wisdom’s tool
resurrection’s
golden wire
ancient touchstone
searing night
strike!
strike!
flint to flame
one small tool
breath be quick
bellow tame
dawn-light curl
dry and crackle
strike!
strike!
each spark—one day
handful’s hours
all you own—
one day—not hope
one strike
torn yoke
cleft night—
prophets’ yearning—
every breath
from you
its burning

(c)2017 by Sanguine Woods. All rights reserved.

(gif: Google Images)